When it comes to feeling confident, it can seem that some people just have it, and others don’t. But this couldn’t be further from the truth! Feeling confident takes a little bit of work everyday, and a lot of mindfulness. And until you achieve that, I truly believe you can fake it before you make it! Putting on an air of commanding confidence even when you’re unsure of yourself, gives you an opportunity to practice until it no longer feels uncomfortable. It can help you believe that you deserve to be confident, and it helps you learn how to trust yourself. Knowing that you are capable of achieving this goal — no matter how challenging it may be — is a crucial part of this journey.
Photo by Author: Jacob about to swing!
No matter where you come from, taking the first steps can be hard! In college, I would opt for an entire grade deduction so I would not have to present in front of the class. I was stubborn but there was also a part of me that wanted to be heard. Something had to give: My urge to be heard or my lack of confidence.
Fast forward a couple of years and I am presenting in front of 300 people, speaking on behalf of Women’s Networking as their President! It goes to show that you never know where life is going to take you, but if you are open to positive change, you can open up a whole new world of opportunities that will serve you.
You may not want to be a public speaker, but you might want to take on confidence and live freely as the person you were meant to be. Follow these four easy steps and you’ll be a little bit closer!
Pay Attention to your Stride
Ever notice someone right away as they enter a room? The power is in their strut. They walk in, standing tall with a warm facial expression and looking straight ahead. These three elements together project confidence. If you aren’t feeling fully confident, pay closer attention to your posture. If you walk sluggish or hunched over, you are giving signals to ignore your presence. This isn’t good practice if you have a want to be noticed positively. Instead, think: Super Woman Pose — stand tall, ready and confident. The next chance you get, walk into a room like you own it with grace — feel the difference? They do too.
I had the opportunity to speak on a panel with 2 other wonderful women practicing the Super Woman pose. Try NOT to feel more confident in this position!
A confident person speaks clearly. If you mumble people are not going to take you seriously. If you don’t believe in what you are saying, no one will either. Say it loud and proud — you deserve to be heard. If this is an extra challenge for you, try attending a Toastmasters group or take singing lessons. Toastmasters groups are not just for people wanting public speaking practice, it’s for anyone who wants to learn how to communicate better and more clearly.
Overcoming my fear of Public speaking opened up so many opportunities for me! Here I am in Honolulu speaking as the President of the NAPW at a networking event.
Think Happy Thoughts
Everything is all in your head. Our thoughts are where our outlook on life is created. We create these thoughts from experiences, beliefs and teachings. Some of those experiences and beliefs were beneficial to us at one time and others have no space in your current situation. If you have hang-ups about your confidence, where do those come from? Identify the root and pull it from your brain. Replace those negative thoughts with positive affirmations and grow a better outlook of yourself. Affirmations are short meaningful sentences aimed to affect the conscious and the subconscious mind. Find some examples here, or create your own!
Photo by Author: Chris Jones Rock Climbing.
Join a Team
Join any and every team sport that sounds fun to you. It’s also a fantastic way to make a new group of positive, confident friends and keep the feel-good vibes throughout your week. Confidence ebbs and flows, and joining a team will help you level out your mind and keep you motivated. Soccer, boxing, running clubs, tennis, badminton, volleyball, golf — anything that will get you moving. I often reflect on my level (or lack of) physical activity when I am feeling a lull in my confidence levels.
Does it scare, you? GOOD! You’re on the right track. If we aren’t growing- we’re dying.